Friends?

Hey guys~

Sorry I know I didn't make a post the last days. I am very sorry about that, but i had to think about a lot recently...
And I am still thinking about it...
Someone told me that i should forget this person and do something with friends... With my friends...
But what are really friends?
Is someone a friend who talks to you again and again? Or someone who send you text messages?
What's the definition of "friend"?
Of course I have some which i called 'friends'.  But are they really friends or just 'better acquaintances'? How do I know that?
Yeah, there is also someone where I can laugh and have fun, someone who understands how I feel in some way. Is that a true friend than? I guess so...
But where is my motivation to do more with these people? Sometimes it's really funny! But most of the time i prefer to stay at home... in my own room... alone. Behind the closed door i can be myself. No masks. No fake smile. Just the truth... Just the dark clouds above me and my thoughts.
Perhaps you think i am very antisocial person? I guess you wouldn't think that when you meet me. I try my best to be 'normal'. hahaha "Normal" that could be another topic where I talk about this word.. a word where is also again no clear (or correct) definition.
But back to the topic! What are friends?
I still don't know...
But I have to stop writing for now... I don't feel really well right now...
Again many thoughts are going throught my mind... Sorry for that..
Perhaps my next post will longer.. we will see...

Bye for now.
Thanks for checking this post out.
Crylicxx